Wednesday, 16 July 2014

100% Shuddha Desi CV

                          Received a call from cousin he asked me to send my CV , after searching many cv formats on net i decided to dump those fake formats , i will do this/that for my country, am very efficient,hardworking, smart thinker etc etc i found them cute and fake so i ended up creating my own 100% shudha Desi CV (Critical View) , please do not laugh am very serious and when i say am very serious i behave like Brazilian team the one who lost in semi finals ..... OK here it goes

 


                                    Critical view
Name-    naam me kya rakha hai , chalo tum kahete ho   
                toh bata dete hai its                            
                वेल्ली मुलगी (mad girl) Nice na ?
Address - Ab tak Maa Baap ka Ghar :/
                 waiting to get kicked out of parents home                                         
Mobile No -Airtel hai 2G wala (Bharti Mittal ki toh )

Email Id     - check mail its attached with address

Career Objective - well haven’t thought much about it, all i want is tata sky with Sports Bonza pack plus enough money to pay my phone bill , ohoo wait u have WiFi in the office ? 
Academic Qualifications
It’s long long Story
Let me make it short
I m an Engineer …. Bas baat khatam

Experience – have good experience of repeating some subjects and not getting good marks (kya kare Chalta hai , shit happens noo ? )

Achievements/Certifications:
Ghanta !!
Tv dekhane me ya bakwas karne me koi Nobel hota toh muzhe hi milta (just like every Indian)

Additional Achievement – I watch Arnab Goswami every day on Tv that’s no less than any achievement noo? 

Political Views – Well I expected Narendra Modi to deliver baby just after having sex (just like every other pure Desi Senty Indian)

Subject Interests – Depends on that particular Situation, market rate etc etc 

Hobbies – well have many hobbies but recently I have developed the hobby stalking my crush on Facebook/twitter etc etc wherever he goes i follow him (am very serious) 

Family Details – enough members to have discussion about politics and Cricket

Languages Known – well I can speak in English, Hindi and Marathi and I can listen in Gujarati ,Punjabi , Urdu
And I can keep quiet in Bengali, Malayalam, Tamil,Telugu
French, Spanish most imp I can say hello in Korean and good bye in Chinese!

Religion – depends on who is playing against who!

Nationality – Shudha Desi  Indian !!

Let me know what u think about my critical View
Good Time !!

  *This was written before my wedding i don't stalk my crush anymore he is my husband now*